But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
