people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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