so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
