Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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