NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
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