I wish I could punch you in the face.
North Korea, Best Korea!
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
