You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
