He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize