He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
