That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
