Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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