Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
