Don't make out with my wife yet
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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