that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
