im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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