If that was your dad, he is hot
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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