it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize