How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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