We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
