my vag is so smooth its legendary
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
