You really coming over, don't trick.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
