I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
