is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize