i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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