i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize