Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
the room spins SO much faster in panama
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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