Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
