I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Randomize
