would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i will never coherently bang her
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
