i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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