is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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