Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Randomize
