Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
i now understand why vodka
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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