Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
