you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize