i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
