I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
