I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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