So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
