I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
