Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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