Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
