Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize