Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
