I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
