omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
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