Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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