bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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