just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
