why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Randomize
